Nicole Bensen

šŸ“¬ Open this if you need a script to say no (this one’s for my fellow over-schedulers)

Are you feeling as steamrolled as I am right now?

With all the end-of-school-year stuff and summer chaos layered on top of real life, I’ve been feeling stretched way too thin. Teacher gifts, graduations, birthday parties, snack duty, travel planning—not to mention democracy being at stake and doing my best to run a one-woman business—it’s a lot.

And then there’s that sneaky voice that says, ā€œOh wow, birthday parties and travel?

Must be so hard for you, Nicole.ā€ šŸ™„ Cue the inner eye-roll.

But overwhelm doesn’t wait for something catastrophic to be valid. Yes, there are big things happening in the world, some deeply heartbreaking and urgent, but that doesn’t make our daily load less real or heavy. It just makes everything a lot to carry at once.

Last week we talked about doing things because you feel like you should—be helpful, kind, agreeable. (Catch up on last week’s note here.)

On top of that, there are things that we genuinely WANT to do too. Like grabbing dinner with friends, or volunteering at school or the animal shelter.

So many things I imagined I’d finally have time for when I started working for myself—like pottery, yoga, or going to a movie in the middle of the day—haven’t really happened the way I thought they would.

You might remember I set a goal this year to do more local networking. And, wow, have I followed through. Coffee chats. Networking events. One-on-ones.

love connecting with people, but…I’ve let the pendulum swing too far, and my calendar is looking like it did back in the corporate days I was eager to leave behind: back-to-back meetings with no breathing room. 😩

When my days get too full, I lose the clarity and momentum I need to do the work that matters most—the kind that reaches more people and creates real impact.

Maybe you can relate?

So I’m reminding myself: I have a choice.

There are things I can’t control right now, but there are also a lot of things I can—like not saying yes just because I technically can.

You can pause.

You can say no.

You can say, ā€œI’ll think about it.ā€

You can say, ā€œNot right now.ā€

I’ve also been working on setting some gentle boundaries.

Over the weekend, I wrote myself a little script I can copy and paste when someone asks to meet up over the next month. Thought I’d share it here in case you want it too:

ā€œThanks for thinking of me. With summer activities, I’ve totally maxed out my personal bandwidth and need to pause on adding anything new to the calendar right now.

Thanks for understanding. I’ll have more breathing room in mid-August to start planning again, after I’ve wrapped up my current commitments, and would love to catch up when things calm down.ā€

Just a small reset to make room for what matters. A reminder that you get to choose how you spend your time, and that rest isn’t a reward we have to earn.

If you’re in the same boat, feel free to borrow it.

– Nicole

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